Monday 15 September 2014

Make-A-Wish☆

Since I've been ill I've had such wonderful opportunities in life, and in this blog I hope to tell you all about them as well as I can and in as much detail before it bores you. I hope you all enjoy reading about my experiences as much as I did being a part of it.

Some of you may know that I've been doing my room up, with the Family Fund and Molly Olly funding it. Now, I absolutely despise the thought of being seen as a 'Charity' because I'm not and it took me a long time to realize that these people were here to help and not treat me as a charity. When I first became sick I was referred to Make-A-Wish and I never told anyone, it was really hard for me to face the fact I was terminally ill and I did not want everyone asking me about it, or treating me like a charity because a charity helped me. I thought when I told people that they would see me different which is why I never told anyone. This is the first time most people will be hearing about my experience with Make-A-Wish and most of them are probably going to be shocked to think I never told them, or that I have kept it a secret for so long but it was something I had to do to protect myself. I also saw it as an opportunity to finally have my own secret, my own little something that no one new about because EVERYONE new I was in hospital, ALL the staff at school new I was sick as well as most of the pupils and it was the only thing I knew nobody else would have to know, the bit of life that I could keep to myself as most of my life was out there now, my whole story except this little chapter of it.

With Make-A-Wish we went through a long process of seeing if I met the criteria of 'fighting a life threatening condition', then after that I had Make-A-Wish volunteers come to my house to ask me what my hobbies were, my favorite TV programs, my favorite book, character, CD, DVD etc etc. When I had my wish I was 14 so I was really indecisive and couldn't make up my mind so I practically just said a load of crap and said the first thing that came to my head. And no, it wasn't a smart thing to do. I don't regret my wish but I definitely wish I had thought of something better. It took absolutely ages to finalize but as soon as it was I was absolutely buzzing, we went on the 19th September 2012 which was back in the day when I was a brown haired girl.


I chose to go to the Waterloo Road set up in Scotland with my Mum and Dad. We caught a flight to Scotland and I was absolutely petrified because it was the first time flying since being ill and the hospital always make a big deal about it so I though I was going to die on it, haha. Anyway, we got taken by taxi from the airport to the hotel where we were staying but because of confidentiality I can't tell you where; but it was a pretty place, with beautiful views and the hotel was very very beautiful. We stayed over night and the next day we got picked up and taken to the set. I had a look around, got given a badge and was given my own dressing room next to Audrey (Georgie Glen). She was so lovely, and made me feel so welcome. I was told to put a 'Waterloo Road' uniform on and as I was getting ready I noticed that Tom Clarkson (Jason Done) was next door to me to, so I had to go get a picture and an autograph. He was my favorite and I love him but then he went and died and I've never cried so much at a television show. I was taken downstairs into the canteen and I met the cast and sat and had lunch with them. IT WAS SO AMAZING AND I JUST DIDN'T SPEAK AND I DON'T KNOW WHY BUT I WISH I DID AND WASN'T SUCH A TIT AND BE A SHY LOSER.


We had a really good lunch and even my Dad got involved which was quite embarrassing. He was speaking to Kevin (Tommy Knight) about the 'Sarah Jane Adventures), haha. They were all really nice and made me feel really welcome, they signed a script I was given and treated me like I was one of their own! After lunch I went and met some more of the cast and started practicing a run through for the scene that I was going to be in, it was all very scary and I was petrified. All I had to do was walk out the front of the building and laugh at the Headteacher and a teacher kissing. Not that hard but I was shaking and nearly in tears but when I got into it I was fine, like a pro me. I ran off a few times to grab photos with cast members, whoops but oh well. It was actually really stressful being an extra and it wasn't even like I did it every day. Talking about my Wish makes me feel so happy, I don't regret it not one little bit. I'm glad I went, and I'm so happy I had the chance to go. It fills me with such joy that even when times are pretty crap, and life is also pretty crap there's people that want to help you have a little life and that's what they did. I felt like I was a crazy person being associated with Make-A-Wish and I'm not sure why but now I realize I wasn't, I was normal to them, and even thought I had never met the people I had the pleasure of meeting, they couldn't of been nicer to me. I had such a wonderful experience and I wouldn't change it for the world. I'm so happy I went. They also gave me lots of goodies, which were signed and a DVD and I also have a badge and all the lovely things, but the pictures will always be my favorite. Oh yeah, and old Mr Budgen (Philip Martin Brown), was away the day I went up and I was gutted so I have a lovely picture of me with his dressing room door, oh how sheek. 

So that was in 2012, and here we are 2 years on. Wish wise, I'm not allowed another one BUT there are other charity's out there. Earlier this year I was referred to the 'Rainbow Trust' which is a children's charity which provides emotional and practical support to families that have a child with a life threatening or terminal illness. I was given a Family Support Worker and she referred me to the Family Fund and Molly Olly. The Family Fund give grants to families who are raising a disabled or seriously ill child or young person, and then Molly Olly give support to children and their families who need additional help including emotional and financial support. Unfortunately I fit into both of those categories but they're here to help. I was accepted by both charities and they offered their help to me. 

With the help of both charities I decided I was going to have my room done up, new paint, wallpaper, new wardrobes, new bed, new everything basically and a completely new theme. Before, my Mum and Dad did my room up for me when I first got sick and it was Pink. I had a single bed, mismatching wardrobes and yeah. Over the year's; I've not grown out of Pink because I still love it and it's definitely still my favorite colour, but I wanted to change it to a more sophisticated look, so I went for Black and White. I wanted and needed a double bed with storage underneath. I spend a lot of time in my room, and I wanted somewhere classy and somewhere I could literally just go and chill out in. As I said a minute ago, a lot of my time is spent in my room because I get tired, and I get migraines and all that so I escape to my bedroom. I also like to escape here because I forget about all my problems, and I forget about being ill and it's my little escapee hut let's say. Molly Olly and the Family Fund were happy to provide the financial support for this to be done, and without them I wouldn't have my new room and my escapee hut. I also have Edwin, Mike, my Dad, my Mum and my boyfriend to thank for all the fabulous work and help they've put in. Edwin wallpapered for me, Mike and Dad have put up furniture, Daniel helped paint and Mum helped me choose furniture, and helped paint and helped do the nitty gritty bits hehe. I couldn't of done it without any of their help either and I love them all so much for everything. 



 I absolutely adore my room, and I can't thank everyone enough for their kindness and generosity; Family Fund, Molly Olly, Dan, Dad, Mum, Mike, Edwin and everyone else that donated clothes so that we could get extra money to buy all the fru fru like photo frames, storage boxes etc; friends, family, neighbours, work colleagues, and all the people I've never met at Zurich. We will definitely be doing more clothes collections soon and donating the money to all the charities that have helped me and my family on our crap journey. I love you all.

Here are the charity's website's that have been mentioned in my blog today so feel free to take a look and learn a little more about the amazing things they do!

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and I hope to blog very very soon!

Erika X








Wednesday 10 September 2014

A fresh start...

So I've realized I should probably start blogging more because I'm only posting like once every 2 weeks. Mainly because I'm mostly sleeping and when I'm not sleeping I'm doing everything I should of been doing when I was sleeping, for example, tidying my room, doing coursework, spending time with my boyfriend and doing some house work around the house, and since I've started 6th form I've not done hardly any of those.

I've had a nasty cold for the past week and a half and it has taken it out of me. I'm struggling to sleep, always going from hot to cold and I've very rarely had energy to do the simplest of tasks like going to the bathroom. It has been awful and finally it's on it's way out which is very good as I simply can not go on with this any longer.

I started 6th form at Commonweal last Thursday and so far I'm really enjoying it. I'm studying Psychology and Sociology for 2 years there and hopefully some Teaching Assistant volunteering in between. I think that's what I want to do now so hopefully I can get somewhere with that. I've managed 5 whole days since being back which is such an achievement for me because before I was making 2-3 days a week which weren't all day. I'm so happy with how things are going with 6th form however it is draining me and every single day so far without fail I've fallen asleep and done no coursework. Whoops. Sixth form is a completely fresh start for most people and I also see it as a fresh start with myself too. I can start fresh with my attendance and my subjects and I have more motivation to do well because I passed my GCSE's which amazed pretty much everyone I know of I think. I came out with a B in English Language, a C in English Literature, C in Maths and a C in IT. I'm so proud of myself and I can't thank everyone enough for all their support and help. Especially my English teacher who also appointed herself to being my life coach. I've realised this blog is all over the place but oh well, I'm sure it'll be ok this once.

Sixth form is really weird and it's really different to school, most of us don't even know if we have to put our hand up in lesson or not? Or whether to call teachers by their first name or second name? And also the fact we can sit and eat and take hot drinks into class is still rather weird and I can't quite get used to it yet but it's still early days. There's a variety of people at sixth, and I never would've thought the people I hang around with would be the people I hang around with. I was definitely too quick to judge who I'd hang around with and become friends with but I absolutely love it. The whole year get on really well, even with new arrivals, everyone just enjoys each others company and gets along. There are definitely some people that I didn't think that would come to sixth form but have done and it's actually really nice to have such a wide variety of people and personalities. It's only the 2nd week in so I'm sure I'll come to moan about one thing or another soon.

My blogs definitely will not be as often as they were before but I will try my hardest to blog at least once or twice every 2-3 weeks, at least until everything is settled and balanced out and I stop being so tired.

Thank you for reading and I will definitely blog soon☺.

Erika X